I managed to piss off a handful of people on Facebook this week. The younger me would have been mortified. Tried to appease those I'd upset and yet still maintain my position. This me is less inclined to care. I don't purposely want to upset anyone but it's impossible to have an opinion that everyone agrees with.
It started with this: the #nomakeupselfie. My timeline was filled with friends, friends of friends and random celebrities baring their all and going make-up free to raise awareness about cancer. On twitter and Facebook I saw photo after photo of fresh faced women nominating others to join in but with no mention of the reason for posting their pics.
I was irritated. Mildly. Only one friend had included details of why she was doing this and how to donate - I did, immediately. Several other people told me they had donated and shared this link outlining how CRUK had received more than 800,000 donations since Tuesday, most of them via text message donations. So why weren't they including the details in their posts?
Not for one minute did I believe that they intentionally left off the reason, simply that like so many things on social media it's easy to get swept along with a hashtag long after its original meaning has been forgotten. Assuming that people will know what you're doing, share your views and support your cause, presumably getting the message by telepathy. Equally I'm not against digital campaigns being used to generate money for good causes but people need to know what the cause is and how to contribute. If they choose not to that's up to them but without the details campaigns like this can seem more about conceit than cancer.
And in saying this I alienated myself pretty quickly from several people. I did however notice that shortly afterwards some of them added the 'Text BEAT to 70099 to donate £3 to CRUK' message to their posts which can only be good.
As a monthly contributor to CRUK I'm a supporter of cancer charities. I've witnessed my Mum and her sister battle with breast cancer (successfully) at a young age, and then last year my Dad died after his cancer re-emerged with ferocious intensity. So it may seem odd to be so critical. But I am. Because whilst 800,000 donations is a spectacularly positive result, how many donation opportunities have been missed because of a lack of information?
I mentioned how the speed of social, a bit like Chinese whispers, can result in something's meaning getting lost as it hurtles from one profile to another. I was unaware of the source of the #nomakeupselfie until a friend shared the origins of this campaign with me. Last September #DARETOBARE encouraged women to go make-up free at work or on a night out as part of a breast cancer awareness campaign. They were to seek sponsorship for going make-up free. It's a courageous thing to do; a nod to those cancer sufferers who have had to brave the world looking different to their former selves - exposed and bare. And do you know something? Evolving #DARETOBARE into a #nomakeupselfie campaign is no bad thing but please explain what you're trying to achieve. If you don't it just looks like you want us to tell you how beautiful you look without your make-up on before asking us to take our own photo hopefully showing us in a similarly good light. And by the way, most of you did look pretty gorgeous bare faced but the one asking me to donate, not pose, got my vote.
There are plenty of cancer charities out there. Pick the one that means something to you. Raise awareness AND make a donation. Encourage cynics like me to put our money where our mouths are - lipstick free.
Next month my husband Will is running the London marathon. He's raising money for Dove House, the hospice where my Dad died. If you haven't donated to a charity recently but would like to support a good cause I can assure you he'll be running make-up free. We'll even share a picture afterwards to prove it ;0) You can donate here.
